Whatever your opinion on the subject of illegal drug use, there are many people who disagree with forced drug testing on the job site or in schools and other institutions. Perhaps they simply see drug testing as an infringement on their human rights. Others might point to the use of legal substances such as alcohol and tobacco as examples of hypocrisy. But most, I suspect, just don’t want “the Man” getting in the way of his buzz.
No matter what the reasoning, there is no doubt that home testing kits for drugs can be used to avoid a positive test result. In fact, it’s actually easier in some respects to do the testing because the subject is a willing participant in the test. There is no need for any authoritarian body to enforce the test. The invasive aspects of drug testing such as urine, saliva and hair sample collection are moot.
Now your basic drug user is going to face some problems though with this defense.
Cost: While urine and saliva tests can be pretty inexpensive, any regular drug user will need to purchase these drug testing kits in bulk.
Accuracy: To do the test properly, you will need to follow detailed instructions and handle samples carefully. Can you do this while you’re high? A lot of people sober can’t do this!
Random Testing: If you’re employer springs a random drug test on you, you need to know that urine and saliva tests will only catch a 2-4 day window.
The Arms Race: Employers and other institutions know that drug users are now using these tests to ensure they test negative. For that reason, more employers are using the gold standard testing method, hair analysis. This method will show drug use over the past 90 days with a two inch long sample of hair. There are also no contamination issues with hair analysis. If you’re employer decides to use this method, you have a couple of choices. Shave your entire body (think Forty Year Old Virgin), or give up drugs for at least 90 days. The one window of opportunity for cheating on this test is the fact that recent drug use will not show up because it takes some time for the drug metabolites to be deposited in the hair follicle. At least until the next test. If the employer decides to do both a saliva test and a hair test, you’re screwed.
Summary
If you’re a weekend toker who’s totally in control of their life otherwise, find out what kind of test it’s going to be. Then decide from there whether it’s worth it to
get the home testing kits, or just fess up. If you’re a stoner, get help. You’re not going to get the job anyway. If you spent the same amount of energy getting your life together as working the system, you’d be way ahead of the game. And, if you feel strongly that drug testing is an invasion of rights, getting busted isn’t the most effective way to change things. Get involved with your community and make some changes.
OK, time for a beer!
